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Thursday, May 13, 2010

Birth Plan Change of Heart???

With Kalina - I was 19 and not very educated on my 'birthing options'. My mom had labored med-free and told me I could do it too - so thats what I thought I should try for. When I got to the hospital I was sure that I was dying a torturous death. I asked for pain meds when the nurses were putting me into the gown ... they laughed at me and told me it was time to push. I arrived at 7 or so cm's dilated and had Kalina an hour to an hour & a half later. Insane but so incredibly exhilarating.

I knew that if I were to ever have another child I wanted to go med-free again.

When pregnant with Brooklyn I committed myself to going med-free and managed to have a very similar experience as with Kalina. I arrived 8 cm's dilated and thought I was surely dying - yet again. I cried and cursed and again - felt completely exhilarated after the delivery.

However - this time - I am truly scared shitless (excuse my french). I think the pain is much too fresh in my memory to truly go into this feeling motivated & empowered. I dont want to do it. Even Braxton Hicks make me cringe this time.

I wonder - has my pain tolerance been compromised?? Are my nether regions traumatized and causing me to rethink this crazy med-free birthing? Something is obviously wrong when I find myself considering an epi'd induction like my OB is encouraging. Last time I was frustrated each time my OB would even consider mentioning the icky 'induction' word.

Im sure some of you are thinking my common sense has finally kicked in. I get it. I do.




10 comments:

Sumer said...
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Rachael said...

I am right there with you. I had Noah medfree and Hazel was an emergency c-section and neither seemed especially pleasant. I know I CAN do it but I'm not sure I want to. We'll see! Good luck and post when you decide :)

Lauren said...

you can do it jess, you are so strong. i thought of you when i was going through my labor and how you were able to do it. re-watch the business of babies to help stay motivated, talk to other people for postive feedback and when in doubt read possible side effects of the epi; you know, the ones that scare you shitless about not feeling your legs etc...!
there is no award for going med free, so if you need them, you need them. i can't imagine being in labor for 12-30hrs and goin med free. but if you show up over the half way mark, i know you can breathe through it.
on a last positive note, this is the LAST TIME YOU HAVE TO DO THIS :)

mindy said...

Why are you considering an induction? Is that simply because you want an epi? I had an epi because I live by the motto, why have pain when you can avoid it. But I didn't have an induction. If you are considering an induction just because you are scared of labor and that is how you are guaranteed an epi, then I would be nervous too. I didn't want an induction.

Mommy Moreno said...

@Lauren: GREAT idea about watching that again!!! and so true about it being the last time.

@Mindy: My OB is encouraging an induction once my cervix is favorable because my labors are so fast & furious. It can ensure the epi and time for the GBS+ antibiotics. With B we had to stay an extra day due to the GBS+ so the baby can be monitored & given an extra dose of the antibiotics.

Mommy Moreno said...
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Mommy Moreno said...
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Shannon said...

You can do it again Jess. I admire you. As for me, I'm no hero...i'd get the epi today if they let me. Induction scheduled for Tuesday.

Mommy Moreno said...

@ Shannon -
ha - im noooo hero ... But thanks Shan!

I cant WAIT to meet your LO! Im rooting for you & am sure all will go smoothly!!

Milesfamily said...

Okay, first of all mad props to you for doing it med free TWICE! Wow, you are my hero!

With my first, I tried really hard to be med free, but at 6cm when he turned and I started getting back labor I caved and got the epidural. I was so scared to get it because that just doesn't sound natural to have a needle go in your spine.....but it only felt like I hit my funny bone and within minutes I couldn't feel a thing! It gave me the energy to push for 2.5 hours.

Now, with my second I got induced. I was 2 days late, and concerned the baby would be too big for me to have naturally (my first was 7 lbs 14 oz and a week early so being 2 days late I was worried about size). Getting induced kicked my a$$. So much more intense then the first time. Really, it was crazy. From the time I got the IV to the time of having the baby was only 6 hours compared to 22 with the first. I wimped out by 3 cm this last time and got the epidural. Having to sit still during contractions to get it is not fun. But again, I felt better, only this time I could still feel pressure. No pain, but pressure. Totally different experience. I'm glad I induced because baby #2 was 8lbs 5 oz and the doc said that was a really big baby for me. Don't know if I would have had to have a c-section if I waited longer.

I know you will make the decision that is right for you. And like posted above, it's the last time you are going to go through it!