Post-Partum Crotch Care 101

I came across this wonderful post on Son of Max. For those of you blog followers that are expecting or hope to be in the near future - bookmark this page. It will be more useful to you than you could ever imagine and your vageen will thank you.

For those of you that are family & friends, I apologize.

Start taking notes ... now:

For those of you with babies in you that will soon need to come out, I heartily recommend purchasing the following items prior to the Big Event:

Crotch Care Kit
• Ice pack
• Frozen peas (very moldable and afterwards; a nutritious snack! Just kidding about the snack part.)
• Heating pad
• Aloe vera gel with Lidocaine (Best stuff ever)
• Cotton squares to apply above-mentioned magic gel (not balls, squares! They hold their form better. Unlike your crotch.)
• Dermoplast Pain Relieving spray (Also good. So squirty! So instantaneous!)
• Peri-bottle (the hospital will give you this as a parting gift)
• Witch hazel (um, what is witch hazel, anyway? Weird. Cool name, though)
• Waterproof donut-shaped pillow (for the bath; they have them at drugstores. Now you know: congratulations!)
• Medicated pre-moistened wipes (you can guess what these are for)
• Boppy (for your bum when sitting, not for the babe)
• The most gigantic maxi pads you can find. Maaaaxxxiiii Padzzzz
• Your pain meds.

There you have it, one more crotch-related post for the people.

Im off to build my own PostPartum kit ...

My Post-Partum Plan

I bought this DVD while I was pregnant and I hated the prenatal part of it - so I used the Gabby Reece DVD instead. But today I checked out the post-partum workout DVD that came with it and so far I really like it! It starts out slow - which is what I need right now and shes funny - she says things like "oh I know you dont want to do this - but just ONE MORE!" haha. Sounds dreadful but I love it.

I'll let you know how it goes - I put on 40 pounds with this pregnancy. They weighed me when I came into labor & delivery (i know, nice, right?!). In the past 2.5 weeks Ive lost half of that. That means Im still 20 lbs. heavier than I was last thanksgiving. But 9 mos on, 9 mos off right??

The Exciting Life of a Post-Partum Mom

Before I had the baby I took Daisy (our dog) EVERY where with me. Since the baby has come it has proven more difficult but I still try to take her when possible. Today she was really exited as she saw me putting my shoes on & getting ready to go - I felt bad for the dog, so I brought her along on the trip to Target. ;-) Afterall, I only needed 2 things - diapers and milk.

Its overcast today and wasnt warm out at all so I new she'd be fine while I ran in. I parked in the back near the cart corral and loaded the baby and the baby's luggage into the cart. Daisy sometimes whines until I get far enough away for her to realize shes not coming in with me - today was no exception. I noticed as I was loading everything in a lady was STARING at me a few cars away as she loaded her stuff. I smiled awkwardly and kept about my business. I honestly had no idea why she was staring at me.

I get in & grab the diapers - after doing the math and realizing they were actually cheaper at Babies R Us and I should've bought them there - I proceed on to get the milk. Over the loud speaker I hear "Will the owner of a gray honda, license plate blah, blah, blah, blah please report to their car." OOOOOH - Thats why she was staring at me. Great - I thought. Is it illegal to leave your dog in the car now? It's not like its 80, 90 or 100 degrees out there for goodness sake - I mean the sun isn't even out yet.

Oh well - I continue to head towards the milk section, grab my cartons and head to the checkout lanes. Im thinking that the security guy is going to be waiting for me but at least I can cross this errand of my list. I head out of the store with diapers and milk in tow and see that no one is waiting for me at my car with the exception of my now quiet and well behaved dog. If only I could explain to Daisy that the whining spectacle she puts on scares people making them think shes in danger, when she's clearly not.

That was probably the most excitement I'll have this week - but that, my friends, is a day in the life of a post-partum mom ... all that excitement and no one to tell it to. The baby's asleep, the husbands at work, the older kid is at school, and the dog doesnt listen too well anyhow.